essays

Blank

I’ve been staring on the screen of my laptop for 15 minutes now, trying to figure out what to write about today. I guess that had to happen so I can write the first two lines for today’s post and even come up with a title for this entry.

I stayed at home today. I was supposed to be working on the material that I will be using on Saturday for U-Night (a monthly gathering of leaders in the campus) but I ended up crouched in bed half the day. The cough has gone worse and my Uncle, who is a doctor, advised me to come see him tomorrow so he can have me checked.

My Achiever theme tells me that if I were to describe my day in one word, it would be what I have decided to call this post – blank. While I am supposed to be ticking off the boxes on my to-do list, I wasn’t able to do anything at all. The least that I was able to do today was to partially complete my coordination duties for the Music Team and then communicate with some people I need to meet for the next few days. But the paper work that needs to get done? Totally not done yet. And I’m feeling so unproductive.

I have been trying to figure out why I don’t feel too well today. Aside from the cough, that is. I feel tired. And then the assurance swept in.

“God is within her, she will not fall;
God will help her at break of day (Psalm 46:5).”

And then this:

“Be still and know that I am God (Psalm 46:10).”

Lord, thank you for making me realize yet again that I can always trust in the fact that you are God and that I am allowed to admit that I am out of strength every once in a while. And that though I am supposed to be strong and courageous, I can also boast about my weakness because it is there that your power is made perfect. Thank you because you are always there to make the fill-ins on the spaces I have to leave blank.

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